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Melanie Cole (Host): Your child is starting kindergarten soon. This is such an exciting time but it can be scary, too. You may have questions about whether your child is ready to go to school or you may be wondering how you can help them get off to a good start. My guest today is Dr. Stacey Williams. She’s a Pediatrician with Hendricks Regional Health. Welcome to the show, Dr. Williams. Let’s start off with every parent’s first question. How do they know if their children are ready for preschool, those early classes or kindergarten?

Dr. Stacey Williams (Guest): I really encourage parents to start thinking about school readiness by the time their child turns three. When children are three, I really encourage parents to explore preschool options in their area. There aren’t really great requirements for a child entering preschool but we know as kindergarten becomes more difficult and more challenging that the requirements for children entering have become more rigorous. I really encourage all parents to look into the preschool options in their area. Even if it’s something that their child is doing two days a week for half a day, it gets the child into that structured setting where the child’s able to learn rules, how to control themselves, how to pay attention as a great start for kindergarten readiness.

Melanie: I look at it as that there’s kind of two factors. There’s the factor of social – clingy, the kid that doesn’t want to leave their moms, holding onto their leg; and then, there’s whether they’re ready, as you say, for attentional things – whether they can sit still and learn and follow instructions. How do they know that part of it and whether those kids are ready for sitting if they haven’t been doing that?

Dr. Williams: That’s really why I encourage parents to look at preschool options because that’s really your child’s best opportunity to have a chance to sit and really practice sitting. I think it’s important for parents to realize that that’s really a learned behavior. Kids don’t naturally just sit still and pay attention. I think in this day and age, parents get very concerned with the academic things that their children need to learn to be ready for kindergarten but they often forget that social aspect. So, doing a form of structured preschool, getting your child involved in story time at the library, gymnastics classes, dance classes and other things where your child has to sit and pay attention to someone who is not you can be very helpful when you’re trying to decide if your child is ready or not.

Melanie: Dr. Williams, because, as you say, someone who’s not you, what if you’re a parent who’s child won’t let go of your leg? How do you approach that and get them into that preschool or early learning class and wrap their little hands away from your leg and say, “Come on. You go look at that little boy he’s playing over there go play with him”?

Dr. Williams: I’m a big fan, with my own personal children and with my patients, of encouraging fairly quick separation. I think it, as the parent, you want to stay until your child is calm and completely comfortable but I think preparing your child that you’re going to have a routine, “Okay. We’re going to give a hug and a kiss and a high five and then mommy’s going to go” is going to be okay and then following through on that plan is important.

Melanie: That’s so hard for some parents and sometimes harder for the parent than the child. What do you tell those parents?

Dr. Williams: Absolutely. I one, reassure them that it absolutely is going to be harder for them than it is for their child and then I encourage them also to keep really good open communication with their child’s preschool teacher or kindergarten teacher so that they’re knowing exactly what happens after they leave. Generally speaking, it does get better over time and a lot of it is just sort of getting those first days or weeks over with while the child adjusts.

Melanie: Are you allowed to be the parent that checks in or when you say “separation”, you remove yourself from the situation and you don’t stare in the windows?

Dr. Williams: I usually encourage parents to fully separate. I think later on, once the child has gotten used to that it’s okay to stick around and sort of watch but I think it makes it easier on both the child’s teacher and the child if you fully separate and then sort of adjust that as they improve in their separation skills.

Melanie: What about interaction with other kids? How do you encourage that? What if your child is either shy because there are some children that are very, very shy or somebody who is not used to sharing?

Dr. Williams: That’s a hard one. One, I think practice is always key. We really start talking to parents about how their child interacts with other children around the age of two. At the age of two, a child is supposed to play alongside a kid, not necessarily share. They hit. They don’t share well. That’s normal but at three, when children are, hopefully, entering these classes or preschool classes, we expect them to be able to learn to share a little bit better. I really encourage parents to recognize their child’s natural personality type. I think that trying to get a shy child not to be shy is not working in their favor. Sort of taking your child and how they interact with people and looking at what you can do to specifically help them. I personally have a child who’s very slow to warm up to things so I’ve realized over time that nothing I do is going to make her warm up faster. I just have to let her be in a place and then, sure enough, she’s going to pick up and start interacting with kids. The harder I push to get her to interact quickly, the longer it’s going to take.

Melanie: How long should their attention span be if they’re looking at those three- and four-year-old preschool classes?

Dr. Williams: If you’re looking at a three- and four-year-old preschool class, I would expect them to be able to pay attention for about 15-20 minutes at a time. Activities are usually going to be changing pretty quickly and, really, for a three- and four-year-old, we still recommend mostly play based learning. They sort of say that play is the work of childhood and so we really want something that’s going to have activity changes quickly because a three- and four-year-old isn’t going to pay attention for much longer than that.

Melanie: Do you like full day just little bit of classes or half day kindergarten? Some kids still nap well into five-years-old.

Dr. Williams: That’s another tough question. In our area, there really is only full day kindergarten offered. Some schools will make exceptions for people who want to do half day kindergarten. My general feeling is that with the rigorous changes that we’ve seen in what people are expected to know by the end of kindergarten, I think most kids would benefit from a full day kindergarten classroom so that they have that full day of learning ahead of them.

Melanie: Do you see a difference with boys and girls when it comes to school readiness, Dr. Williams?

Dr. Williams: Not necessarily. I think that there are a lot of girls who are ready for school and there also a lot of boys who are ready for school. I think it more is based on age, although boys may be don’t correlate quite as well with girls who are equal to their age. I think a lot more of school readiness depends on what parents have done to prepare their child for school. I think that the biggest difference we see is children who have done some sort of preschool versus no preschool at all.

Melanie: Let’s talk about things that they should practice, maybe with their children before they even start them? You know, some early childhood skills like potty training, dressing themselves, zipping and snapping – what do you tell parents that they should practice with their children before they’re going to send them off to be little independent, adorable little things?

Dr. Williams: Potty training is definitely big. A lot of preschools still do have potty training requirements. That said, it’s one of those things you can’t force your child to do. So, following your child, believe in not pushing them to potty train before they really are ready is very important. Also really encouraging your child to be confident in their skills and be independent in their skills. So, the ability to put a coat on by themselves, get their shoes on, tie their shoes, if they can do that. We see a lot of kids in this day and age who are using lots of technology when learning but I think it’s important for parents to remember to get back to some of those fine motor skills that we’re still really emphasizing in school. Coloring – by the age of four children should be able to decently color in the lines of a picture. Basic handwriting before their entering school – we want them to be able to at least write their first and last name and maybe associate sounds with those letter. Scissors – I’m always amazed by how many kids haven’t picked up a pair of scissors. Get a pair of scissors in their hands and have them practice cutting out basic shapes, circles, squares, triangles and things like that.

Melanie: What a great list. In just the last few minutes, give parents your best advice as they are not sure if their children are ready to start going off to school and what you tell them every single day about getting their children ready.

Dr. Williams: The big advice that I would give parents is, if your child has been in preschool talk to your child’s preschool teacher. If your child hasn’t been in preschool talk to your child’s pediatrician. We want to see all of our kids before they enter school to at least do vision and hearing screening to make sure that medically and physically they’re ready to enter school. We also service really good sounding boards on what your child knows and what they can do to help you decide, especially if your child is at one of those border ages with your school corporation’s cut off when your child should be ready for school. I encourage parents also to sort of take a deep breath. I think we all know that education is important but, really, there is a lot of room for catch up in kindergarten. Your child doesn’t have to know everything but is helpful if they know something. I encourage parents not to be overly stressed about it because that’s only going to stress their kid out more and have fun because really what a lot of teachers are looking for is a child who enjoys learning and who is enthusiastic about learning because that really is what’s going to set your child up for a lifetime of success.

Melanie: What great information, Dr. Williams. Thank you so much for being with us. You’re listening to Health Talks with HRH. For more information you can go to Hendricks.org. That’s hendricks.org. This is Melanie Cole. Thanks so much for listening.